Sunday, July 17, 2011

Update on Ty

It always takes me a while to post because I honestly have so many emotions that it takes time to literally sort through them all. Last week we touched based with our allergist and talked about our upcoming appointment at Duke for the end of August. While Ty was in the hospital and the doctor was reading over some of Ty's lab results he told us "Ty's milk allergy is so bad, science says he will NEVER outgrown this." That stung a lot!!!! The doctor said that he got together with all of Ty's previous allergists from two other practices and decided that Ty was the "gold star" of Greenville and they all agreed that a case like his needed to be seen by the "experts." The doctor really liked a practice in Cincinnati but that is too far for us to travel with Ty and our limitations so Duke is best suited for us. He is not sure what is going to happen at this appointment because he is too young to be included in any of the trials and tests but the doctors there really need to meet Ty and build a relationship with him, follow his progress and perhaps use him for upcoming tests when he turns six. Either way, our doctors feel like their doctors should meet Ty and learn of his story. Sometimes it really makes me sad to think that he really is that bad to need to be sent to different doctors just to "meet" him. To be honest, I've really been struggling lately. If there is ever a word to describe our life, above scary, it would be "isolating."
Last night, Chad and I got to go on a very last minute date and as we were sitting down eating at the restaurant my husband looks at me and says "Do you know what my dream is?" and as I shook my head he said "to take my son out to eat." People don't realize what a treat that is. Not only for the food aspect but also just to have a fun outing together and share that time of bonding over a good meal. Also, I realize that it is getting harder to hang out with friends and such because unless we are at our house, it really is an inconvenience to try to "Ty-proof" the situation so it is just easier to not involve us. Praise God for such an amazing family who really goes out of their way to keep Ty safe and luckily there are a lot of cousins so there is no shortness of friends. Lately we have hung out with some new friends and I thank God everyday for slowly expanding our "bubble" :) All I want is for my children to be happy and alive and if I get healthy along with those, than I will have won the lottery :)
As I was feeling extremely sorry for myself this morning at church (I was wishing I could be in the choir but can't b/c I work at nights and Ty can't go to any kind of daycare, and VBS was beginning and i was praying he wouldn't notice b/c it was not going to be safe for him) God did an amazing thing through me this morning. The preacher at Praise Cathedral was speaking about God working miracles but only for those who are right with the Lord. Although I love the Lord, I am definitely making more time for Facebook than I am for my Bible. Thanks to the preacher it hit me, I care more about Ty being healed than I do about God using this whole situation to further His Glory. What a shame!!!!!! I now realize that God specifically chose our family to deal with this and He did so for a reason and I have to believe that He will provide every step of the way what He sees to be fit. That means no more pouting, no more crying, and no more pitty parties. Instead PRAISE for the fact that all five times Ty has gone through anaphylaxis, God has given Ty LIFE!!!!! Already a miracle!!!!!! And just like when you read a book, you know the beginning and the only way to get to the end is to keep reading page by page and eventually you will know how it turns out. But you can't put the book down b/c it got too scary or you feel alone, you have to march on and keep reading. That is what we are going to do. And as our amazing church and Pastor Jerry laid their arms around us and prayed for our son, I knew at that moment God is working. I don't know how, when, or why, but God is working through us and though Ty. And for that alone I will always sing His praises!!!!! So the statement earlier from the doctor that Ty will never outgrow this according to science.....Luckily I pray to God and not to science and my God is an awesome God who can do ANYTHING!!!!!! I can't wait to see how our next chapter turns out.

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